A Week to Process

I feel like...

I'm happy and thankful to be here.

I feel like I've been forced to do a lot more self evaluation then I thought I'd have to do in the past week. It's been a little over a week now since I've arrived in Dublin, and it wasn't until just recently I felt like I was able to properly process the experience so far in any form of coherent conversation.

My internship is not what I expected, entirely insane, kind of sketchy, kind of frustrating, kind of awesome, and entirely confusing.

My roommates are friendly, personable girls who lead lifestyles entirely different than mine.

Dublin is cold, I didn't pack correctly, and our apartment is kind of gross.

The program I went through needs improvement.

It's hard to think about Chicago.

These are the thoughts and conversations I had with the other girls last week. In fact, we went on a day trip on a cold cold rainy Saturday, sat in a pub, and basically drowned ourselves in pessimism.

However, we're all extremely glad to be here. None of us regretted it, there was just a lot of stuff this first week that threw us for a loop. It's easy to take one or two bad days in the first week and let it bring you down.

But, all that aside. The very next day was probably the best day we've had here yet. Things are good. Ireland is good. I can make the most out of my internship, and the girls I've met are awesome. I'm excited to be here.

I just think sometimes going abroad is so idealized that you forget that it's still real life, therefore it's bound to be flawed.

Also in the first week, I was always ALWAYS around people, and this is not how I function healthily. The first time I got the chance, I went out on my own and started walking to find coffee. This is the first time I felt truly excited to be here. We always go places in groups, which is good and fun and I usually prefer this... but the past few days I've set out by myself to get lost and it truly has been the best.

Like, today I was determined to find fresh cheap produce, so I started walking. I walked and I walked until I found a farmers market... figured out which direction I was facing and walked and turned and walked until I found a street I knew and walked back.

This is how I work, I feel. So many plans are being made to go to all these important places in Ireland or Dublin, and I feel like pointing to a village on a map, taking a backpack... and getting there. Or walking down an alley until I find a tiny hole that sells food.

With that being said, I'm at Starbucks right now. This is because of a few things. One, Ireland has TONS of cafes.... that close by 3 pm. Also, I feel like Starbucks is home, and sometimes that feels nice.

These are my feelings. And now I have expressed them enough so that now I can move on! Things are great, things are far from perfect, and I hope you are enjoying your summer at home because you should be. :] I promise you will all have a chance to travel soon, please don't be jealous. Jealousy does no good!!

Exciting, completely optimistic blogs with pictures to come. Soon. :]