September

I have a lot of thoughts.

Thoughts like the possibility that Chicago is my soulmate.
Thoughts like the fact that I should use my laundry quarters for laundry and not coffee.
Thoughts like the fact that I am terrified of not squeezing and using my location and resources to every ounce of their full potential.
Thoughts like the fact that I don't like not being able to trust everyone you see and be friendly to them.
Thoughts like screenprinting ink onto burlap.
Thoughts like shoes.
Thoughts like art.
Thoughts like you.


I see something worth writing about every single day of my life. I thought about starting a Tumblr with a thought a day, but I think I'm going to do that here. A thought a day put into one post a week. I've already talked to you guys about my love of archiving my past into one nice location. Having all these sites in my past like Myspace, past blogs, Tumblr, Facebook... I really just want one. I want one place to look back at in 15 years and say, "Look. Look how naive I was. Except, I can easily see how naive I was because my past thoughts and interactions are organized into one handy place!"


Anyway, I observe a lot of things.

Things like a girl on the train reading "Bossy Pants." I watched her closely as she read, because I knew I could catch her smiling at least once.
Things like my Art History teacher who has an accent identical to that of Michele's on Gilmore Girls, and the fact that he uses the adjective "sexy" to describe stone age art more than any other art historian. I am sure.
Things like my Pottermore letter, finally. :]
Things like boys who stepped out of a JCrew magazine.
Things like the entire skyline from my roof.



I really really love my life. So much so, that almost every single day I am sure something huge is going to go wrong. Because it can't all be this good. Something bad is going to happen. But, for now, nothing is wrong. Well, I did have to get familiar with the doctor the third week of school. But, it's all fixed now.

I got a job at the Gap.
On a related note, I'm too tiny for their jeans.
This makes me feel bad about myself.
But then I went to a different store.
And couldn't zip a bigger size up than the size I "was" at Gap.
So, that made me feel human again.

The last two years I've posted FALL FALL FALL FALL blogs. Trust me, I still love fall. But I'll just leave it at that this year. Go drown yourself in everything pumpkin. :]

Hello!

There is not much else I'd like to do on a rainy Sunday afternoon than veg in sweatpants, a hot mug of tea, a little Greg Laswell and a blank canvas to type my thoughts.

(With that being said, I want to post this Coldplay song I've been listening to so so much, even though I just mentioned Greg Laswell._

  Coldplay - Paradise by dual_bign

So, friends, where are we?

I'm -

Loving school. Taking a little while to get used to four hour classes, but loving school. Some of my professors are so interesting. From having an urban gardening professor lead conversations with the class as though we're all just in a coffee shop discussing life, to having a man who has worked directly with Mark Ecko and McDonald's billboards teaching me about design... I couldn't be happier about where I am.

Trying not to take things for granted. Trying not to let things that amaze me about this city become routine.

Trying to find a job. I'll let you know when good things happen.

Trying to become better at taking sneaky pictures of my phone of all the boys in the city who have, I am sure, just come from a J Crew photoshoot. So far, I am not able to take a successful picture of anyone without them clearly being able to tell/ I'm way too nervous. Oops.

Trying to get to know friendly curly-haired-folk-music-writing train boy in my class. I hate letting friendships happen naturally. Gosh!

I had a couple group interviews this week (goodness knows I am not a fan!) I actually had one at Anthropologie. Fantastic, no? Well, kind of. Except for the fact that I prepared so much for it and felt more like just a number after it was done than I'd felt in a long time. So, I more than likely won't get the job, but I'm over it. However, the woman interviewing us was married with kids, and talked about something in a way I had never thought about it before. I love when this happens! Except, it's a very interesting idea... or opinion, I suppose.

First, a little personal backstory - Sometimes, especially since I've gotten to Chicago, I feel selfish. Like, I'm wonderfully motivated and on the right track for what I want to do with my life. But I'm so excited about it that I begin to feel selfish because it's all about me. I do all these things for me. And sometimes I worry this is how I'll always be.

My interview began talking about how this is the "perfect time in our lives to be selfish", and that we should be a little selfish right now. With our hobbies, with our activities, with... ourselves. She said that this is how she was when she was our age, and now she's over it. She'd done with that. She'd rather be selfless for her family now more than anything.

She even went as far to say that this is a huge contributing factor to the divorce rate. That when you marry so young, you get selfish later in life because you never took those years when you were younger to explore who you are, what you want, and what makes you happy alone. 

She said this is how she will raise her daughter. To encourage her to be a little selfish during these years. Because, it will end. We will want to settle. We will get sick of it. But we'll have lived this phase of our lives, and be a better individual because of it.

So, maybe it's okay that I feel a little selfish right now.

I think it is.

<3

Culture Shock

"I don't know if you drive
If you love the ground beneath you
I don't know if you write letters or you panic on the phone
I'd like to call you all the same,
If you want to
I am game

I don't know if you can swim
If the sea is any draw for you
If your better in the morning or when the sun goes down
I'd like to call you

I don't know if you can dance
If the thought ever occurred to you
If you eat what you've been given or you push it around your plate
I'd like to cook for you all the same
I would want to
I am game."

-Lisa Hannigan, I Don't Know

Can you experience culture shock from moving from a small to a big city? Because this is what I'm calling it.

The weirdest thing? KNOWING that if there's something you want, it's within walking distance.

My first full day in the city was full of welcome week stuff. A HUGE convocation bash in the park for new students. There were hipsters EVERYWHERE. If I was with one of my friends from home, we would have exchanged so so many side comments about all the hipster cliches. It really was humorous.
But the thing is, I loooove it. And literally NOTHING you can do/say/wear will stand out.

But I honestly felt bad for having a plastic water bottle. There was even a Washing/Rinsing/Filling station for metal water bottles.

Then I went to my department's connections program thing. I learned a lot about my program from three professors. (My favorite? A friendly looking man with a tactful mustache. He was adorable and passionate about dorky things.) One woman professor was a guest speaker at the BAUHAUS. This means nothing to most, but in the art world.... you know about the Bauhaus. It was architecturally and educationally revolutionary.

There I learned that we are pretty much friends with Threadless. FRIENDS! The AIGA (the professonal association for design) uses their warehouse from time to time. ^&WTRGBAFKEUY&W^A$&T
Anyway, then I hopped on the train to the Threadless store and bought a $10 Harry Potter tee. Free shipping. Ten dollars. Threadless doesn't get much cheaper than this!

(Ps. For 48 hours starting Labor Day ALL tees are $10. You are not going to want to miss this... Have fun. Splurge.)

OH, did I mention I got a pumpkin spice latte during that day because Chicago got the PSL a week before the rest of the country?! Oh. Yeah. That happened.

So. I ended that day completely and utterly elated.*

I feel like people in big cities are spoiled. Big time. I mean, everything is monies. But it's all here. And everyone looks cute. All the time.

Anyway. Our apartment is officially clean, organized and awesome. For the first time in 20 years I feel like my room is completely a current representation of my personality.

With all this being said, I still lack friends to do these cool things with... as much as I love exploring by myself. So, I am going to go continue chowing down on episodes of Arrested Development in the familiarity of my bed.

Pictures soon, once I get my camera.

Job soon.

School soon.

*Except for the fact that Burt wasn't eliminated from Project Runway yet. Who's with me?!