Here.

I want to blog.

This month I've been listening to The National like crazy. For some reason it has been one of the only calmers for me lately.

I've finished 4 weeks of school now. I'd say I'm at the point of massive self-doubt. In my abilities. In my talent. Everything is discouraging. I have to consistently make an effort not to be discouraged. I just feel incompetent in every way.

But.

It's a work in progress.

I'm not unhappy. I want to make that clear. Just questioning everything, as you do in your mid-twenties, I hear. Everyone just seems so much better than I.

This is my last full time semester. I graduate next December, after a few classes in the fall. So... that I'm thankful for. Nearly all my friends are gearing up for graduation. I am thankful I'm not.

I'm going to VidCon... you know, that YouTube conference John and Hank started a while back? That one. I look forward to it each and every day. Speaking of YouTube, I've been keeping up on my channel recently, for those of you who didn't know that.

I miss writing.

I haven't been taking very good care of myself lately. May I blame winter? Senior year of college. Is emotionally the hardest, eventfully the craziest, and successfully the most rewarding year. I'm ready to be done. Except I never want to be done with college.

Life.

Guys.

xx