Hello!

There is not much else I'd like to do on a rainy Sunday afternoon than veg in sweatpants, a hot mug of tea, a little Greg Laswell and a blank canvas to type my thoughts.

(With that being said, I want to post this Coldplay song I've been listening to so so much, even though I just mentioned Greg Laswell._

  Coldplay - Paradise by dual_bign

So, friends, where are we?

I'm -

Loving school. Taking a little while to get used to four hour classes, but loving school. Some of my professors are so interesting. From having an urban gardening professor lead conversations with the class as though we're all just in a coffee shop discussing life, to having a man who has worked directly with Mark Ecko and McDonald's billboards teaching me about design... I couldn't be happier about where I am.

Trying not to take things for granted. Trying not to let things that amaze me about this city become routine.

Trying to find a job. I'll let you know when good things happen.

Trying to become better at taking sneaky pictures of my phone of all the boys in the city who have, I am sure, just come from a J Crew photoshoot. So far, I am not able to take a successful picture of anyone without them clearly being able to tell/ I'm way too nervous. Oops.

Trying to get to know friendly curly-haired-folk-music-writing train boy in my class. I hate letting friendships happen naturally. Gosh!

I had a couple group interviews this week (goodness knows I am not a fan!) I actually had one at Anthropologie. Fantastic, no? Well, kind of. Except for the fact that I prepared so much for it and felt more like just a number after it was done than I'd felt in a long time. So, I more than likely won't get the job, but I'm over it. However, the woman interviewing us was married with kids, and talked about something in a way I had never thought about it before. I love when this happens! Except, it's a very interesting idea... or opinion, I suppose.

First, a little personal backstory - Sometimes, especially since I've gotten to Chicago, I feel selfish. Like, I'm wonderfully motivated and on the right track for what I want to do with my life. But I'm so excited about it that I begin to feel selfish because it's all about me. I do all these things for me. And sometimes I worry this is how I'll always be.

My interview began talking about how this is the "perfect time in our lives to be selfish", and that we should be a little selfish right now. With our hobbies, with our activities, with... ourselves. She said that this is how she was when she was our age, and now she's over it. She'd done with that. She'd rather be selfless for her family now more than anything.

She even went as far to say that this is a huge contributing factor to the divorce rate. That when you marry so young, you get selfish later in life because you never took those years when you were younger to explore who you are, what you want, and what makes you happy alone. 

She said this is how she will raise her daughter. To encourage her to be a little selfish during these years. Because, it will end. We will want to settle. We will get sick of it. But we'll have lived this phase of our lives, and be a better individual because of it.

So, maybe it's okay that I feel a little selfish right now.

I think it is.

<3