Staring

So, I’m on my way to Minnesota riding the Megabus for the first time. I had low expectations, but so far I am surprisingly pleased.

I think I’ve mastered the window stare. You know, when you can see someone’s reflection in the window thereby giving you a prime people watching cover? And then if they see you, they won’t be able to tell if you’re watching them or just staring out the window in pensive thought.

Anyway, all the passengers are way more friendly and way less sketchy than I thought. We stopped on the UW campus and picked up like 15 students. I’ve exchanged a few words with a couple of passengers, but nothing close to sustained conversation.

However, a few rows in front of me is a boy who is a freshman in college and a sweet woman I’m guessing in her late sixties. They have been in conversation since the moment they sat down. This boy has this extraordinary ability to converse. To be able to converse with a total stranger from an entirely different generation for five straight hours is amazing. Not to mention being able to carry a conversation and ALSO not be crazy narcissistic.

About three hours into the trip they exchanged names.

And then phone numbers.

It’s funny how different observing this is than how it would be if this woman was around his age. But she’s not. She’s a sweet lady with all her kids grown up and moved away.  She’s not a 19 year old girl he wants to ask on a date.

I think the fact that they exchanged phone numbers is the cutest thing of all.

But I don’t think I could do this. I don’t think I could make connections with all these different people I meet on public transportation knowing that I’d never see them again. I can’t handle that. I hold on to too much. I let everyone I connect with take a little piece of me, and I don’t forget about them.

Do you ever think about that? How that certain people you see/talk to/observe you will never run into again? I think about this too often. It’s such a depressing thought. Luckily, as it is with much of the human memory, it’s usually fleeting.

I think he’s caught me watching them in the window.

Maybe I need to work on that, after all.




Does anyone watch PanAm? Let's talk about it. :]
Oh! Links - One for cheap clothes and one for cheap coffee. What's better?!

You Live and You Learn

I know you learn new things every day, but I feel like I've been learning at an exceptionally fast pace recently. Involuntarily and voluntarily. Academically and culturally. I've been pushing myself an insane amount, because being behind is one of my least favorite things in the world. I hate HATE missing things, opportunities, people, events. The right side of my brain has slowly been engulfing my life. Everything is design. The things I do to procrastinate have to do with design.

I'm officially "Linkedin." I have become a "prospect" in the Graphic Design playground, "Dribbble." And I've stuck my foot in a variety of things I am still completely unprepared and way too amateur for. #exhausting

The other things I learn and attempt to keep up on are all about culture. Last fall in Minnesota I was intoduced to Toms. I told my friend who lived in Chicago about them, and she said everyone in Chicago had them. They were old news. So now I'm in Chicago, and I think about this all the time. I wonder whether or not the popular Jeffery Campbell shoes that have five inch thick heels will be popular outside of the city.  I wonder if Hunter rainboots are common outside of the city, because by golly everyone has them here. I start to forget that in other cities, saying, "I'm vegan" will get you blank stares and questions and not a, "Yeah, me too."

But I miss cheap thrift stores.
I miss $.99 Arizona tea.
I miss no tax on clothing.
I miss fall in Wisconsin.

And I still think my favorite place to be in anywhere in the middle of nowhere.

Other than that, everything is still wonderful. I can just see flaws more clearly now and think more realistically about what it's like to live in the city.

Now, one final thing. One of, if not the best night thus far here was spent at a screening of Like Crazy at the Chicago International Film Festival. Not only had I been excited to see this movie ever since last winter when it won at Sundance, but I was able to see it with the actors and director. It was so surreal and wonderful. I got to ask the very last question, and Anton Yelchin (that funny Russian boy from Star Trek... :] ) looked me straight in the eyes as he answered. So lovely. I think these are the only pictures I've taken so far, since my phone camera died.

Not to mention the film is phenomenal.  Pheeenooomenal.

Men.

Dear Man Who Hates To Shop,

I love you. You're so willing to be helped. You take my opinion like it's fact. You talk to me like we're friends, and you take suggestions like candy and compliments like winning the lottery. You make me smile, you brighten my day, and I absolutely love picking out outfits for you. Thank you.

Come to my store, let me help you.



Dear Man Who Hates To Shop,

Don't come shopping with me. I will probably be in the store longer than you want me to, which is not at all. I know you're not happy waiting outside, but darling, sometimes a girl has got to shop. You're frustrating because I really want to please you, but your strut into a mall feels as though it should be accompanied by the Funeral March.

Stay at home, I cannot please you. 


--------------------


Yesterday, the first customer I said hi to looked at me with this huge sympathetic smile and said, "I hate shopping." This is something that happens a lot, and I absolutely love it. But this man just made me smile so much. He told me what he was looking for, so we talked about it for a little while. Within 60 seconds of knowing me, he looked at me and said, "I'm sorry, but are you a drawer or a painter?" Confused, I nodded and told him I was majoring in Graphic Design. He said, "Yeah. I got that vibe!"

I felt like he knew me, in a non-creepy way.

In the dressing room, I had him try a few things ("I hate trying on, so I'm only going in there once!") and we found an outfit that he fell in love with. Oh, the strange things that feel rewarding. I spent the whole night in the dressing room, and it's officially my favorite place to work. It's messy as crap, but if I give an opinion, they will take it. It's so cute.

When we were learning about selling to men, my supervisor said, "What if you were in the dressing room, came out in a pair of pants and a guy said "Oh those look fantastic on you!" One girl said, "I would buy them in every single color." So true.


It works like a charm. Like a charm!

Selling to men is not something I've ever had to think about. But it's really interesting how different it is than selling to women. If you say, "This is our most popular fit." to a man, he will say okay,buy it in three colors, and not come back for six months. If you say, "This is our most popular fit." A woman will probably say okay, stare at in for a few minutes, try it on for a few more minutes, not like the stitching on the back pocket, and go back to the floor for round two.



Today is beautiful.
I like the smell of dead leaves.

xx

Stitched

Today, I have a picture, quote & a song for you.

I listen to Oh Land on the train. OH my LANDta I'm obsessed with her.

  Perfection by OhLand

“I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

-Augusten Burroughs

Alright, now that we've set the mood, here are some things.

Today I was eating lunch at Panera (some things never change...) and next to me was 5 or six businessmen eating lunch on their break. They were probably between the ages of 28-34. I could hear their conversation quite clearly, and when I realized it was about a love interest, the ears perked up. It was SO cute, I'm not going to lie. They were giving one of the guys advice on a woman he was interested in. From what I could gather, she was leaving soon or had a layover here for a short time or SOMETHING that had to do with an airport, because of the guys said, "Go to the airport and stop her from leaving!" Another said, "Yeah! It works in all the RomComs!"

Two friends from Minnesota came this past weekend. It was so much fun because I had an excuse to be a tourist and do touristy things. Except when one is a girl and one is a boy, you are guaranteed either said boy or said girl will be a puddle of boredom at some point of the day. Don't you hate this? When you're responsible for plans that keep everyone happy? It's a tough job. Goodness. Anyway, I think it turned out well. Minus the shoe shopping.

Today I had my African American history class. It's about a 25 person class, and I'd say 5 of us are  white. Anyway, it's always a very discussion oriented class with some very opinionated people. I'm usually more timid about my thoughts, because I know less about where they came from and what kind of environment they grew up in, ya know? Well today I was the one who knew what NAACP stood for. I think I got major props for this.

Anyway, I'm writing a 15 page cultural ethnography on Nerdfighters as a culture. We're supposed to do a culture we can physically go to a location and observe, but I made a case for the overwhelming online presence of Nerdfighters. So I might be observing ya'll. o_0

What I think:

Boots are way too expensive.

What I know:

I am starting to get nervous for my brewers.

There was so much more, I know it. I can't remember. I'll talk sooon then.

September

I have a lot of thoughts.

Thoughts like the possibility that Chicago is my soulmate.
Thoughts like the fact that I should use my laundry quarters for laundry and not coffee.
Thoughts like the fact that I am terrified of not squeezing and using my location and resources to every ounce of their full potential.
Thoughts like the fact that I don't like not being able to trust everyone you see and be friendly to them.
Thoughts like screenprinting ink onto burlap.
Thoughts like shoes.
Thoughts like art.
Thoughts like you.


I see something worth writing about every single day of my life. I thought about starting a Tumblr with a thought a day, but I think I'm going to do that here. A thought a day put into one post a week. I've already talked to you guys about my love of archiving my past into one nice location. Having all these sites in my past like Myspace, past blogs, Tumblr, Facebook... I really just want one. I want one place to look back at in 15 years and say, "Look. Look how naive I was. Except, I can easily see how naive I was because my past thoughts and interactions are organized into one handy place!"


Anyway, I observe a lot of things.

Things like a girl on the train reading "Bossy Pants." I watched her closely as she read, because I knew I could catch her smiling at least once.
Things like my Art History teacher who has an accent identical to that of Michele's on Gilmore Girls, and the fact that he uses the adjective "sexy" to describe stone age art more than any other art historian. I am sure.
Things like my Pottermore letter, finally. :]
Things like boys who stepped out of a JCrew magazine.
Things like the entire skyline from my roof.



I really really love my life. So much so, that almost every single day I am sure something huge is going to go wrong. Because it can't all be this good. Something bad is going to happen. But, for now, nothing is wrong. Well, I did have to get familiar with the doctor the third week of school. But, it's all fixed now.

I got a job at the Gap.
On a related note, I'm too tiny for their jeans.
This makes me feel bad about myself.
But then I went to a different store.
And couldn't zip a bigger size up than the size I "was" at Gap.
So, that made me feel human again.

The last two years I've posted FALL FALL FALL FALL blogs. Trust me, I still love fall. But I'll just leave it at that this year. Go drown yourself in everything pumpkin. :]

Hello!

There is not much else I'd like to do on a rainy Sunday afternoon than veg in sweatpants, a hot mug of tea, a little Greg Laswell and a blank canvas to type my thoughts.

(With that being said, I want to post this Coldplay song I've been listening to so so much, even though I just mentioned Greg Laswell._

  Coldplay - Paradise by dual_bign

So, friends, where are we?

I'm -

Loving school. Taking a little while to get used to four hour classes, but loving school. Some of my professors are so interesting. From having an urban gardening professor lead conversations with the class as though we're all just in a coffee shop discussing life, to having a man who has worked directly with Mark Ecko and McDonald's billboards teaching me about design... I couldn't be happier about where I am.

Trying not to take things for granted. Trying not to let things that amaze me about this city become routine.

Trying to find a job. I'll let you know when good things happen.

Trying to become better at taking sneaky pictures of my phone of all the boys in the city who have, I am sure, just come from a J Crew photoshoot. So far, I am not able to take a successful picture of anyone without them clearly being able to tell/ I'm way too nervous. Oops.

Trying to get to know friendly curly-haired-folk-music-writing train boy in my class. I hate letting friendships happen naturally. Gosh!

I had a couple group interviews this week (goodness knows I am not a fan!) I actually had one at Anthropologie. Fantastic, no? Well, kind of. Except for the fact that I prepared so much for it and felt more like just a number after it was done than I'd felt in a long time. So, I more than likely won't get the job, but I'm over it. However, the woman interviewing us was married with kids, and talked about something in a way I had never thought about it before. I love when this happens! Except, it's a very interesting idea... or opinion, I suppose.

First, a little personal backstory - Sometimes, especially since I've gotten to Chicago, I feel selfish. Like, I'm wonderfully motivated and on the right track for what I want to do with my life. But I'm so excited about it that I begin to feel selfish because it's all about me. I do all these things for me. And sometimes I worry this is how I'll always be.

My interview began talking about how this is the "perfect time in our lives to be selfish", and that we should be a little selfish right now. With our hobbies, with our activities, with... ourselves. She said that this is how she was when she was our age, and now she's over it. She'd done with that. She'd rather be selfless for her family now more than anything.

She even went as far to say that this is a huge contributing factor to the divorce rate. That when you marry so young, you get selfish later in life because you never took those years when you were younger to explore who you are, what you want, and what makes you happy alone. 

She said this is how she will raise her daughter. To encourage her to be a little selfish during these years. Because, it will end. We will want to settle. We will get sick of it. But we'll have lived this phase of our lives, and be a better individual because of it.

So, maybe it's okay that I feel a little selfish right now.

I think it is.

<3

Culture Shock

"I don't know if you drive
If you love the ground beneath you
I don't know if you write letters or you panic on the phone
I'd like to call you all the same,
If you want to
I am game

I don't know if you can swim
If the sea is any draw for you
If your better in the morning or when the sun goes down
I'd like to call you

I don't know if you can dance
If the thought ever occurred to you
If you eat what you've been given or you push it around your plate
I'd like to cook for you all the same
I would want to
I am game."

-Lisa Hannigan, I Don't Know

Can you experience culture shock from moving from a small to a big city? Because this is what I'm calling it.

The weirdest thing? KNOWING that if there's something you want, it's within walking distance.

My first full day in the city was full of welcome week stuff. A HUGE convocation bash in the park for new students. There were hipsters EVERYWHERE. If I was with one of my friends from home, we would have exchanged so so many side comments about all the hipster cliches. It really was humorous.
But the thing is, I loooove it. And literally NOTHING you can do/say/wear will stand out.

But I honestly felt bad for having a plastic water bottle. There was even a Washing/Rinsing/Filling station for metal water bottles.

Then I went to my department's connections program thing. I learned a lot about my program from three professors. (My favorite? A friendly looking man with a tactful mustache. He was adorable and passionate about dorky things.) One woman professor was a guest speaker at the BAUHAUS. This means nothing to most, but in the art world.... you know about the Bauhaus. It was architecturally and educationally revolutionary.

There I learned that we are pretty much friends with Threadless. FRIENDS! The AIGA (the professonal association for design) uses their warehouse from time to time. ^&WTRGBAFKEUY&W^A$&T
Anyway, then I hopped on the train to the Threadless store and bought a $10 Harry Potter tee. Free shipping. Ten dollars. Threadless doesn't get much cheaper than this!

(Ps. For 48 hours starting Labor Day ALL tees are $10. You are not going to want to miss this... Have fun. Splurge.)

OH, did I mention I got a pumpkin spice latte during that day because Chicago got the PSL a week before the rest of the country?! Oh. Yeah. That happened.

So. I ended that day completely and utterly elated.*

I feel like people in big cities are spoiled. Big time. I mean, everything is monies. But it's all here. And everyone looks cute. All the time.

Anyway. Our apartment is officially clean, organized and awesome. For the first time in 20 years I feel like my room is completely a current representation of my personality.

With all this being said, I still lack friends to do these cool things with... as much as I love exploring by myself. So, I am going to go continue chowing down on episodes of Arrested Development in the familiarity of my bed.

Pictures soon, once I get my camera.

Job soon.

School soon.

*Except for the fact that Burt wasn't eliminated from Project Runway yet. Who's with me?!